Death
by the stargate time traveller
Summary: AU. The last chapter in the series I started with Divorce and ignores the Series 4 ending with Sharon dying of a heart attack. Rachel is a single mother to daughters Amber and Mikaela, but whilst it looks happy on the outside everyone in the extended Bailey family is waiting on tenterhooks; Sharon is dying from leukemia, her health is deteriorating. And Sean is out there.


**Authors Note - I'm back - more or less.**

 **The final chapter which started with 'Divorce.'**

 **Scott & Bailey.**

 **Death.**

"Oh, I am so sorry," Janet said automatically, not seeing who it was as her trolley banged against another, resulting in a short cry of shock from the other person, but then she saw who it was.

"It's okay, Janet, I wasn't looking where I was going myself," Sharon replied with a smile, taking out a handkerchief dotted with dried blood and holding it to her nose before checking for blood. Janet tried to smile back at her, but it was hard because the leukemia Sharon had been diagnosed with having really started to show itself. She looked thinner than she had the last time Janet had seen her, despite her best attempts to hide it from the outside world. Her eyes looked tired, like she was about to collapse to the ground, and she had lost quite a lot of her hair, Janet knew, the rest was tied up in a purple bandana. Janet hoped she didn't collapse, she knew Rachel and Alison had been driven mad with worry recently for their mother, who'd collapsed several times over the last few months, though one of the last cases had been when Sharon had suffered from a heart attack.

Janet was trying to think of something meaningful to say to Sharon, something other than "how are you?" because she doubted it would be a wise move. She and Sharon had never really... hit it off at first, much like Rachel and her own mother, Janet's heart clenched with sadness. Dorothy had finally died six months ago, but Janet was happy because her mother had lived to a very good age, much better than what she'd feared, and much longer than she'd expected.

One of the reasons why Janet had never had an easier time with Sharon was because of how the other woman had acted like a drunken loony when they'd first met. Oh, she'd been friendly at first, but then she'd gotten drunk and ruined Rachel and Sean's wedding. Janet could still remember the way she'd been described as snobby when Sharon had made that phone call to Rachel, hurting her when she and Sean had split up.

In hindsight, it wasn't Sharon's fault that both Rachel and Alison had decided to repeat history, and pretend she didn't exist when she lived down the road. It was Sean and his bloody family who had to take some of the blame for lying to Sharon, saying it was Rachel who was sleeping behind her husbands' back.

When it had come out Sharon had leukemia, she had made the effort to make amends with Rachel's extended family, and she had become quite close to one or two of them, since the specter of death hanging over her shoulders had made her more sensitive and mature, but she had still retained her zest for life. Janet wasn't sure which she preferred; the Sharon who could party, shag, fuck and drink like you wouldn't know, or this new Sharon, the one who was becoming increasingly aware of how mortal she was, and just as aware of how fragile life could be, and that she should make every waking moment count because they would never return again. It was a weird outlook of a woman who had laughed and partied her way through life as though it were eternal.

With the first one, Janet knew Sharon could've pretended, or at least imagined that the leukemia was a dream. But as the years had passed, her second persona had become more and more dominant. God, that made her sound like she had a split personality.

Sharon seemed to sense Janet's hesitance for a conversation, though she dearly wanted to start one. "It's been six months, hasn't it?" She knew it was a morbid way to start a discussion, but it was nice to say a few words of condolences.

One of the strangest things to have happened in Janet's life was the close friendship between her mother and Sharon, two women who couldn't be any different, well except both of them were prone to sickness, whereas the other was dying slowly. Dorothy hadn't really thought much of Sharon at first, she'd believed her to be an older version of Rachel, but Rachel had changed a great deal in Dorothy's eyes with the birth of Amber and Mikaela. When she had discovered Sharon's leukemia, how the woman still tried to be fun loving because that was who she was and how she wanted to appear, how she didn't want to be seen as weak... It had really struck a chord with Dorothy, and the pair of them had become close friends.

Janet nodded, closing her eyes and trying not to burst out crying. She knew what Sharon was trying to say and do, and she was grateful. "Yeah. How're things your end?"

Sharon tried to offer her typical lopsided smile, the same smile Rachel wore, but it came off as strained. "Not good. I'm sorry I didn't make it to the funeral, Janet-"

"It's okay," Janet interrupted; they'd been over this dozens of times before, "we understood."

Sharon looked away. She'd been in hospital, getting over the heart attack she'd had when Dorothy had died. "Thank you," she said quietly.

Janet smiled back, and together the two women pushed their trolleys through the supermarket. "If you don't mind me asking, what've you been doing? No-one's heard from you in a while."

Sharon didn't answer the question immediately as they'd both pushed their trolleys into the pasta & sauce section, and gingerly keeping hold of the trolley meant she didn't fall and hurt herself. As she looked over the different products and comparing their prices, Sharon replied at last.

"No, it's okay. Ever since Dorothy died, I've decided that it's time," she turned her head to study Janet. The blonde woman was stunned by the solemnity of her stare since it didn't really belong on a face that usually smiled. "I've been getting everything in order. I started the work soon after making it up with Alison and Rachel, but I lost interest 'cause I didn't want to make it seem real."

"The leukemia?"

"Yeah, and the twins were taking up my attention," Sharon replied, knowing the question was rhetorical, but treated it like it was real anyway. "But over the years," she shook her head, "the stress of the chemo treatments, keeping my symptoms hidden from Amber and Mikaela, the twinges in my health...It's just become worse Janet. More difficult to focus, but it was after your mother died, and I had that heart attack that I decided to get my act together. That's why no-one's seen me recently, I've been speaking to my solicitor, arranging my will."

Janet blinked, and she couldn't help but say, "I'm sorry."

Sharon looked at her with almost comic surprise, sensing there was more to what Janet had said than what she could actually mean. "Sorry for what?"

"That it was my mother's death that made you, well-" Janet looked away.

Sharon walked slowly over to Janet, and placed two gentle hands connected to frail arms onto her shoulders. "Janet, it was the heart attack as well that made me realise I'd put off on doing things like properly making out a will, sorting out my affairs. Don't you dare apologise for that, ever Janet. This has been a long time coming, it just took me a little longer to see it. Besides, I'm hardly innocent. I think one of the reasons," she let go of Janet's shoulders and she walked back to her trolley, speaking on the way, "I've been holding off is because I didn't want to think about Claire. Be reminded of her."

"Claire?" Janet asked. She'd never heard of anybody called Claire in all the time she'd known Rachel and Alison.

Sharon didn't seem surprised by Janet's curiosity and puzzlement. "My sister. I'm not surprised you haven't heard of her, Rachel and she were anything but close, and neither was I," she replied briefly, her tone giving more than enough information to Janet what kind of relationship she'd likely had with her.

She sighed and explained, "Claire was 9 years older than me when I were born. She was nasty; you and Gill might've thought I was stupid and cruel to my daughters, but I would never have even dreamt of doing the kinds of things Claire had done to me as a kid. Even I knew there was a line. I won't go into details about what life was like with her, what she did to me as a kid. Anyway, there was no love lost between us. We only met once or twice a year, or even never for years or months. That suited us both fine. When I had the kids I never even thought of her as a potential godmother, and she wasn't even bothered.

"The kids - I can't really say what Dom thought about her - hated her as well. She was nasty to them, even when Alison once spent days working on a card for her birthday, forgotten which one, and the foul bitch tore it up in front of Alison's eyes with the excuse she didn't like the color. I don't think I need to tell you how Alison reacted to that one."

Janet had a very good idea. Alison was one of the most sensitive people she knew, she could easily picture a child Alison crying her eyes out when someone she had passed a gift onto just tore it to shreds in front of her.

"Why did she do that?" she asked, unable to imagine someone wanting to hurt a child, particularly not Alison.

"Sheer spite. It governed most of the things she did," Sharon said grimly, her eyes flicking from the shelves to her listener. "Claire ran a dog breeding place, and on some occasions it did quite well financially though none of the dogs ever made it to the top shows. Didn't stop her from trying, though. She was ambitious though she rarely put the effort into making those ambitions come true, and she was bone idle and she never bothered to properly care for the dogs on occasion."

Pictures of starving, filthy dogs covered in their own shit entered Janet's mind, but she didn't say anything when Sharon continued with her monologue.

"Claire was fat, and I mean fat, every time she moved it was like hearing...," Sharon stumbled looking for an example, "the Flying Scotsman pull out of Manchester Piccadilly. She was so large that she blotted out the sun. She couldn't seem to stop eating. There was always a cheescake or whole pizza nearby for her to nibble on. She ate more food than she ever gave to her dogs, and if you thought me and Rachel were bad when it came to drinking and smoking you should've seen Claire, and you'd have called the pair of us conservative with our fags. At least we knew our limits, especially Rachel when she still smoked before she had the twins. But Claire," Sharon shook her head, smiling without humor. It disappeared as she remembered her sister's filthy ways. "She also had zero hygiene, and she never tried to make the effort to clean herself up; she always wore clothes that she'd been wearing for months without changing or cleaning them. They were covered in muck, bits of food, ingrained fag ash, spillages from her drinks. And you can smell her down a street. It was so bad half the shops in her neighborhood banned her from walking through the doors. Her smoking was horrendous. Once one fag was out, another one went back into her mouth, all day long. It made her place reek like I cannot tell you, and lord alone knows what the stains on her walls and ceilings were. Between that and the amount of fatty foods she ate is it any wonder she died?"

Janet shook her head though she hadn't had a clue how this mystery woman had died, but now she did and she found she wasn't surprised, "No, it doesn't. So you had to arrange the funeral?"

It was a logical conclusion in Janet's mind, why else would Sharon bring up a sister she detested if she hadn't?

Sharon chuckled without humor, "Yeah, good deduction, and I hated every minute of it, too. I was practically the only relative around who was willing to help and there was so much I had to take care of, even things I didn't know about until I was halfway through. I also did it for the money since Claire owned quite a bit of land 'cause of the dogs and the kennels, and I was the only one working since Mike had gone into one of his phases where he'd work for a short time before going back to the couch. I also had to deal with the dogs, the house, get people to come in and clean and decorate the dump, then sell the damn place. It took a week to properly air the place to get rid of the stench. All the others refused to help me. My sister knew how to drive family away, it was one of the few things she was really talented in, and I lost more than one friend 'cause of her when I were a kid, the evil bitch, and Claire didn't have that many friends of her own in the area. Practically none. I did have help from a few of the children of the neighborhood, but they'd wanted to get some of the stuff to sell themselves, and I let them since I thought they were worthless and unappealing and that Claire owed them something for all the hell she'd put some of them through. From what I've told you Janet, how do you think my sister was with kids in her neighborhood, and taking into account that she had dogs what do you think happened?"

Janet only needed a moment to guess, but when she did she groaned, "There were attacks, weren't there?"

"Yep. Bad ones," Sharon said grimly, checking things off the shelves and dropping some of them into her trolley. Janet followed, doing the same thing. She wasn't expecting any stories about dog attacks caused by her best friend's aunt's carelessness, but Sharon couldn't resist, "Around the time my sister died, one of her dogs had escaped. It was starving unsurprisingly, desperate for food, and considering the state some of them were in when I saw them, I wouldn't have been surprised if it was rabid. It attacked a little girl. I've forgotten how old she was. If that kid's father hadn't been around, working with tools, she would've been torn to pieces. He killed the dog with a chainsaw. That was possibly one of the worst cases, but I suspect there were others. It might also explain why her finances were so bad, she was being forced to pay for the damages."

Janet realised she'd become so entranced by this story she'd practically forgotten about her shopping, and as they went she concentrated both on what was on offer and what Sharon was saying to her. "She was being sued, that coupled with her diet and poor health probably didn't help matters. When I showed up to clean up the mess, and sort through the documents in her place, I had to deal with the dogs, and believe me they were not in a good state. I said most of them were uncared for, that they were starving.

"I had them taken to the vet. Their health was soon restored, and they were properly looked afterwards, and eventually they found their way to loving homes. Only one or two of them were too dangerous to keep, so they had to be put down. But its a happy ending for the majority.

"I only wish the rest of the story was as happy. It took me six months whenever I could get a chance whenever I was away from work to sort through everything. Mike, my husband, and of course Dom weren't any help. In fact they didn't lift a finger, which was not what I wanted let alone needed. I had to spend hours, day and night, sometimes I wouldn't get home until half four in the morning, have a bath to rinse the muck off, have something to eat, get some kip, go to work before having to do it all over again. And both men were waiting to be fed, it was ridiculous. Alison and Rachel were the only ones to help, the only trouble was they had school. They could only help when their days were over."

"How old was Rachel when all this happened?" Janet asked curiously.

"She was about 10 years old," Sharon replied, "but they were godsends."

So 3 years before you left.

"I know you've said that Rachel and Alison hated Claire, but how did they react when she died?" Janet questioned as she picked up some washing up liquid that was on offer.

"If you're expecting me to say they were both upset despite the reality, then you're in for a disappointment. They weren't sorry at the news Claire had died, especially Alison. Rachel only met Claire four times in her life when the disgusting bitch was still alive. Once when she was a toddler, who'd run towards Claire for a hug before I could stop her. She was only a kid and she'd never met the woman before so she didn't know what to expect, only to be smacked and screamed at. Twice when she was six, and then finally when she was eight. I can tell you she wasn't sorry at the funeral, not one tear."

Sharon and Janet went silent as they pushed their trolleys - Janet knew she could be following her normal route, but truthfully she wanted to keep an eye on Sharon in case anything happened.

"How did everything go with Claire in the end?" Janet asked, deliberately keeping the word funeral from entering the discussion. The less images she had of death the better, her mother's death was too fresh in her mind.

"I decided to have her cremated," Sharon replied. "Besides, I spent months looking for a will before deciding to take the law into my own hands. There were far better people out there who deserved a plot in a graveyard, and besides a larger plot and coffin would be too expensive, and no one really wanted anything to do with her in death as well in life, so what would be the point of burying her?"

Janet knew from her long friendships with Alison and Rachel that the Baileys in general could be quite unforgiving, even to each other despite their loyalty to family. She wasn't surprised by Sharon's reply, well not much.

"In any case I had my hands full dealing with the house, getting it cleaned up, decorating it and getting it ready for the market so I really didn't have the time to go for a full funeral. A cremation was better. I had asked myself if I wanted it to be rented, that way we'd have another source of income. In the end I went with the just sell it idea after toying with it all," Sharon went on, "but I learnt a few things from that mess."

"What's that?" Janet frowned.

"Always keep track of your papers, and don't ever let your layabout husband speak to a solicitor you'd spent 3 weeks speaking to in a 3 minute conversation to mess it all up."

"Oh no, was it important?" Janet asked, already dreading the answer.

"Yeah, and Mike went and cocked it up, meaning I had to take a day off work to get it all back on track on top of the other off days I'd had to take just to clean up Claire's place. I nearly lost my job because of it," Sharon said like it was nothing of consequence, but Janet knew she'd expended anger that time. She didn't blame her; Janet had lost her own temper with Adrian often enough when the fool had fucked things up for her own plans. "Basically it was to discuss what kind of things I needed to do with the house before putting it on the market, and I'd made arrangements. He was just phoning me to confirm our arrangements and tell me that there were other options that had appeared, only for my idiot husband to cock the whole bloody thing up."

"I know how you feel," Janet replied, "my ex husband, Adrian, had a parents evening when I'd told him to pick my mother up from Manchester Piccadilly station from a visit to some friends. I must have drummed that in his head, eight times."

"Shit," Sharon cursed as she pictured Dorothy standing alone at Manchester Piccadilly at night. "How long did she have to wait, and how come she didn't get a taxi?"

Janet gave a humorless smile as she remembered. "Mum hated taxis and buses, she preferred others gave her a lift. She felt she could trust them. And as for how long she had to wait for, well about 2 hours or so. I gave Adrian a call, asking him how mum was, and I could not believe it. I screamed at him to go and pick her up. Lets just say, a new watch was the only thing I got him for Christmas. I don't know if he got the hint."

Sharon shook her head, mouthing 'two hours' in unhidden disbelief. She didn't need to imagine how horrible it was to be cold and lonely outside a train station, she'd often found herself in such a position on more than one occasion.

"When was this?"

"A year and a half before I met Rachel," Janet shrugged. "Sharon, I hope you don't mind me asking, but-"

"Why am I getting ready to die?" Sharon finished for her with a small smile before she spoke in that blunt tone Janet knew so well. It faded as she started explaining, her tone brutally honest. "I'm tired Janet, I'm tired of living. I've been thinking about death since I got the results from that checkup from the doctors. I'd hoped it was a dream, but I called them to confirm and yeah, I've got leukemia. It's only been the bone marrow transplants from the girls that've kept me alive this long, but all they've done is prolong the fear that one night I'll go to bed and never wake up again the next morning. It's terrifying.

"But I am grateful, Janet, believe me. If it weren't for those treatments, I would never have known Mikaela, Amber, or even Holly. It took me a long time to form a relationship with that granddaughter, I didn't want to blow it. It was heartbreaking to tell them I was suffering from leukemia, even if Holly had actually suspected it. But that heart attack scared me, and Dorothy's death didn't make it easier."

Janet knew what she meant about the kids. Alison and Rachel had decided that it wasn't a good idea to tell their respective children about the leukemia until a number of years had passed. They hadn't wanted their children to feel frightened their long lost grandmother wouldn't be there the next day, and Janet had no idea if there were any near misses over the years. Amber and Mikaela hadn't found out until they were about 13, whereas Holly had known for a while since the girl was an adult by the time the twins had reached 14. Sharon was right that Holly had suspected it, but she had done her research and confronted Alison about it, and Janet had no idea what kind of confrontation they'd had, but she could imagine Holly being both upset and terrified for Sharon.

But she knew only too well what kind of reaction Amber and Mikaela had had when they'd found out; she'd seen it for herself though truthfully she hadn't really expected them to find out whilst she and Gill had been around. They'd known Rachel and Alison had decided to keep the knowledge to themselves so it wouldn't change the twins' quick relationship with Sharon. Amber and Mikaela had become teenagers when they'd discovered the leukemia, and they had followed the typical Bailey reactions, the reactions women in that family reached when they'd hit their teens, and their bodies were constantly bombarded with hormones; they had been stunned, then they reacted much like their mother did whenever something horrible happened but they had no real way of properly dealing with it. They had been all "how couldn't you tell us?" or "we'd had the right to know!"

In many ways Amber and Mikaela were still kids, and so was Rachel since her best friend didn't want to lose touch with her youth; it was only her best friend's experience that had helped her stop the twins from going on the rampage.

"That and the fact you had to deal with your sister's arrangements which meant you would have to do the same with yours," she pointed out.

Sharon nodded, "Spot on."

It wasn't a difficult deduction since Sharon had practically hinted as much, but now the whole story was out in the open Janet could piece it together, though she'd had a good idea what the problem had been for Sharon.

"Is it difficult?" Janet asked the only remaining question on her mind, she had found that getting her own mother's affairs in order had been difficult and easy at the same time. One of the things that had defined her mother was her need to be organised, so the principle there was straightforward. It was the need to do it which was hard because Dorothy had been her mother.

Sharon, however, looked confused, "Is what difficult?"

Janet bit her lip before she blurted out what was on her mind, god she'd been hanging around Rachel too long, "Getting everything sorted."

Now Sharon understood. "No, not really," she replied solemnly, she was doing the solemn thing again, "When I was with Mike, I always kept the taxes, bills, papers together and neat. I made sure they were filed monthly rather than throwing them all over the place. No problem there. The only problem I had in the past was that I couldn't face it, I didn't want to do it because it would confirm I had leukemia. I knew I'd have to face reality eventually, but I didn't expect it to be so soon."

Janet understood exactly what Sharon was telling her, but it still hurt to realise that it had taken her mother's death to partially motivate the woman into preparing for her death. It was morbid, and Janet didn't have to be psychic to guess how the rest of the family was taking this.

* * *

Amber and Mikaela Bailey were similar in many ways to their mother, well a lot of ways actually, and proud of it too, thank you very much, but being twins, they had their own personalities that complimented each other and their mother and Aunt Alison; Mikaela was the one who took after their mother most of all whilst Amber took after Alison with a more sensitive persona that helped make sure she never launched herself head on into a problem, but she was just as capable of flying off the handle like her mother and twin.

But at the moment they were both distracted with their school work. Both twins refused to be parted from each other in school since the moment they'd entered nursery, and they usually partnered with one another during lessons. They hated working with others because it changed the whole dynamic of how they could interact with others. Some teachers hadn't recognised that until the twins had deliberately sat themselves next to each other, refusing to work with anyone besides each other. Amber and Mikaela did sometimes work with others, but that was more out of necessity than out of any real desire. For the twins were natural loners by nature, and they preferred being independent, so whenever they did have to work with others they were always reluctant but they did as they were told.

Despite their ups and downs the twins did great work, but the last few weeks had shown a drop in their work quality. The teachers had noted the twins had seemed distracted recently, and though one of their more biased and insensitive teachers - actually their only biased and insensitive teacher - had tried to punish them for their seeming lack of attention, they'd told their tutor when the teacher's irrational dislike for them and their lack of attention had gotten out of hand, who in turn had told their teachers what was bothering the twins in an attempt to make them understand. The rest of the teachers had been sympathetic, of course, something which would normally call the twins since sympathy from others was an almost strict no-no in the Bailey genetic makeup.

Ever since they'd discovered their grandmother was suffering from leukemia the twins had both been terrified out of their minds, and all their friends had rallied round them, made them sure they got through every day of school without incident, and their teachers did their best to help the twins, but there was so little they could do.

A few of the bullies, some of them who felt the world owed them something had made the mistake of picking on Amber, only for Mikaela to lash out and for Amber to prove that just because she was sensitive and kind, that didn't mean she wasn't defenceless. She could punch as well as her sister, shout as loud as her mother, and she was capable of defending herself.

Unfortunately the biased and insensitive bastard of a teacher made the second mistake of contacting the girl's mother, ignoring the twin's attempts to get him to stop though not for the reasons he thought; they of course knew that their mother was a copper, and she did not like being disturbed, especially by a teacher who seemed to have it out for her daughters. The man believed he held all the cards, but he'd failed to realise what he'd done in the past.

Rachel had received letters from the man about how shoddy the girl's work was, and she'd had them checked by taking their workbooks to her friends. None of them had found anything wrong in the books, and Rachel had spoken harshly to the man to stop picking on them, and she'd even taken it to the headteacher. Pity the stupid fool had forgotten that the twin's grandmother was in hospital, recovering from a heart attack. He also seemed to have forgotten the annoyance that Rachel had piled on him after discovering he was essentially picking on her daughters.

So he phoned Rachel, left a message when she was in the middle of a really difficult case, and when she received it she'd come storming into the school the next day because she'd been too busy concentrating on the case to answer the phone until later, but she didn't punish the twins, oh no. Instead, she'd asked another teacher who'd witnessed the whole event and the twins who'd told her everything what had happened. The story was more plausible than the load of shit the pissfaced twat of a teacher had given her, but on top of that Rachel had a lot of pent up fear for her mother which transmuted into anger, and she discovered the perfect outlet for her rage.

The teacher emerged looking like a bomb had exploded in his face, and he'd stopped picking on students for the next few weeks, even jumping whenever he saw Amber or Mikaela because of their resemblance to Rachel.

The twins knew it wouldn't last, but they didn't care, they had more important things to worry themselves to death with, like the knowledge their grandmother had leukemia, that she'd only survived so long because of the chemo treatments she'd received for 10 years, the terror of the heart attack that could finally be the thing that killed their grandmother, their Aunt Dorothy's death and funeral, Taisie and Elise... Worrying about some pathetic little teacher was always going come second to the twins compared to their greater problems.

The twins were a little worried because their Aunt Janet had come to the flat the night before, and told them about the meeting she'd had with Sharon at the supermarket. Their mother had been a bit surprised Sharon had even mentioned Claire, and she'd had to reveal that little facet of Bailey history to the twins in case they got the idea in their minds they had other cousins. They didn't. Over the years they'd met some of their more distant relatives, but those meetings were few and far between, and truthfully the twins could see why their mother wasn't very enthusiastic about meeting them. The twins and their mother lived separate lives from their other relatives.

Amber and Mikaela had been more than a little bit upset their grandmother was preparing herself to die, but they tried to see it from her perspective; you suffer a heart attack, and one of your close friends dies reminding you of your mortality when you're suffering from leukemia, and you need to undergo treatments just to keep yourself alive when your body was beginning to fail. The twins remembered the last time they'd seen their grandmother; Sharon had always, somehow, managed to look fit and healthy despite the leukemia, and she'd always pushed her weaknesses aside through sheer willpower. The twins had no idea, looking back, how she'd done it. They had noticed as the years had passed their grandmother had seemed to be getting a little thinner, easily worn out, but she had always passed it off with a smile. The twins had bought it, hook, line and sinker. Unfortunately time and the heart attack had shattered the illusion into little pieces. Mikaela, usually the more...boisterous of the twins, showed that she had some sensitivity, and she hadn't rushed towards her grandmother with the force of a cannon ball. She wasn't even sure her grandmother would be able to pick herself up if she did.

Amber saw her sister pause in her work, nudged her, and then they both went back to what they were supposed to be doing. When lunch came, the twins chatted together in the one place they could find some semblance of peace. Their school's library was open during breaks, the sisters sometimes used this to their advantage to dress up or start and finish their homework, but for now they could read and chat in peace. They hadn't wanted their friends to hear this depressing conversation, so they'd held back from speaking about it.

Their friends understood, and they were more than kind enough to leave the twins alone unless they needed to talk to someone else.

"I was thinking," Mikaela started, "of visiting gran after school today."

Amber nodded. "That's a good idea. But will she happy to see us? Don't forget we've called her, emailed her, knocked on her door; she might not to see us."

Cursing her twin's need to point out the bloody obvious whilst withholding any optimism herself, Mikaela said, "I know. But we can at least try. Now she's spoken to Aunt Janet, maybe she'll speak to us."

Though she wanted to be a bit more centered in reality, Amber knew there was a sense of logic in what her sister had just said. Maybe, after meeting Janet their grandmother would be happy to see them, maybe even open up to them. Amber understood, well they both did, she had a lot on her plate right now, and she hoped she'd only stopped to speak to Janet out of the need to have a conversation. Part of her wondered if what she and Mikaela had planned would be a good move, and not something that would explode in their faces and cause everyone - her mother, her Aunt Alison - more needless grief.

Amber only hoped it didn't blow up in their faces.

"Ok, mum, thanks," Mikaela said over her mobile just as the two girls were leaving school. Mikaela had wanted to call her mother when they were halfway to their gran, but Amber had pointed out that maybe it was a wise move to call their mother when school had ended.

"How did she take it?" Amber asked her twin, though she could tell from her sister's body language that the response had been positive and reassuring, then again her sister was capable of lying. She only hoped Mikaela had the common sense and decency not to lie today, not like this.

The smile her twin sent her made her feel more positive about this; Mikaela might have been good at lying to other people, but she could never lie to her sister. Amber had a sixth sense to when her twin was lying to her, it came from years of experience, and their mother and Aunts were not far behind; their Aunt Gill, for instance, ooh, Amber could remember the last and only time her sister had lied to her.

Gill had seen through the lie. Gill had lost it.

Their mother had lost it when she'd heard the story.

Mikaela had been so shaken by the rages from the two women she hadn't lied to anyone for months, but Amber had been sceptical it would last.

"She thought it was a nice idea," Mikaela replied.

Amber lifted a brow, folding her arms, her very stance saying "oh really? Do tell."

Mikaela sighed, "Ok, she said it was a nice idea for us, but we shouldn't get our hopes up."

Amber blinked, seeing and sensing the truth in her twin's reply. "Was that really so hard?"

"I told you the truth didn't I?"

Amber smirked at her sister's defensive retort. "Ok," she decided to move on, "enough of that. Do you think we should get her some chocolates, you know, to leave by her door in case she doesn't open the door?"

Mikaela was in the process of rolling her eyes when she did a Daffy Duck. "Hold on, I've just had an idea, we could get gran a box of chocolates to make her feel better, just in case she doesn't open the door. Why didn't I think of that earlier?"

Gritting her teeth, Amber replied sarcastically, "Gee, I don't know Mikaela, it could be 'cause I thought of that idea, and you took the credit for it?"

One of the downturns of being twins with Mikaela was she sometimes laughed at her sister's ideas before taking credit for them, deep down inside Mikaela believed they were good ideas. This was just her idea of agreeing with them.

Mikaela shrugged nonchalantly, "Whatever you say, sis."

Amber rolled her eyes, half in affection for her twin, half in irritation. It took the twins 20 minutes to travel to their grandmother's house, it wasn't far on bike. On the way they stopped to pick up some chocolates, ferreo rocher, and they arrived at their grandmother's home fairly quickly. As the two teenagers approached, they felt nervous because they had no idea what their grandmother was doing, and what made the whole thing even more terrifying was the fact they had no idea what kind of state her health was in now. For all they knew Sharon could be lying on her back, barely breathing and inches away from death's door. Amber shook her head to clear the thought away, and tried to think of things more positively.

One look at her sister almost undid her efforts. Like with the lying, Amber could tell when her sister was nervous, even if she didn't show it on her face. It was a kind of telepathy, something twins had.

Unlike her twin, Mikaela didn't need to glance at her sister to know or guess she was nervous. The reason for that was simple enough; Amber usually wore her feelings on her sleeve, making it easy for people to guess she was worried. Mikaela didn't blame her twin for this one. She was terrified as well, though she would never admit it to anyone.

As the sisters got off their bikes and tied them up, Mikaela opened her rucksack and took out the chocolates they'd bought, and the two sisters walked up to the door, pausing to look through the window into the living room. No-one was there. It wasn't very encouraging for the Bailey sisters, but that didn't stop them from trying.

Amber raised her hand to press the doorbell, hesitated, then she mustered her courage and pressed the button. Silence. The girls stood out there, waiting for two minutes, then Amber pressed the button again.

Again, nothing.

Amber sighed, but she didn't give up. "Gran?" she called through the letterbox, "Gran, it's only the horrible duo. Ow, Mikaela!" She added when her sister punched her in the arm. "We only wanted to see if you were okay, we haven't seen you for a while, and we're worried 'bout you. We've got you some chocolates. They're out here. See you soon, yeah?" she added hesitantly, rubbing the numb-sore spot on her arm from where Mikaela punched her.

Mikaela sighed, and she took out one of her books, scrawled a quick message on it, and put it inside the bag with the chocolates. The girls unfastened their bikes, and they were about to leave when they bumped into Sharon.

"Oh," the woman gasped in surprise when her vision was suddenly overtaken with the sight of two girls on bikes. "Amber, Mikaela, how many times have I got to tell you to not jump out on those things without warning?"

Naturally, the twins ignored this in favor of getting off their bikes, and hugging their grandmother. Amber smiled as she buried her face in her grandmother's neck, her smile fading when she realised how frail Sharon was. She was more skin and bones than the last time they'd hugged her.

She pulled away, Mikaela doing the same thing. The twins caught each other's eyes, the same worry and concern in both their eyes. Mikaela had noted the frailty as well. The last time they'd hugged Sharon, she'd been frail, but not this bad.

Their eyes had caught the fatigue in her face, the purple bandana... They were both worried for her, and they had no problems communicating that to each other.

Sharon rolled her eyes as the twins did that weird communications thing again. "Okay, you two, stop it. I'm fine, honestly."

The twins detected the lie easily, but they didn't call her up on it. They didn't know what kind of mood that would put Sharon in, and besides they didn't want to test her health anymore than it already was being tested.

Sharon saw their expressions and knew they hadn't bought the lie, and she rolled her eyes again. It was really hard to lie to someone in her family, especially if that person had bypassed a certain age, and if you've been lying to them since the moment you'd met them, as Sharon had done with the twins though she'd only done it to stop them from having a hard time with her. She hadn't told them about her poor health for years, so was it a complete surprise the girls didn't believe her when she said she was fine when it was clear she wasn't?

"What're you doing here?" she asked, the sooner they left this horrible topic, the better.

The twins glanced at each other for a moment, conferring about what they should say. Sharon had a good idea why the twins were here; all her grandchildren had flocked to her house, taking after their parents in their worry, so really she wasn't truly surprised to find them here.

Amber's reply confirmed her theory. "We just wanted to visit, to make sure you were okay."

Sharon smiled at them. "That's nice of you," she replied, deciding to be truthful for a change. "Do you want to come inside, have something to drink?"

The twins grinned back at her.

Sharon was pleasantly surprised and happy with the gift of the chocolates the twins had bought only to leave outside her home, and when they went inside the twins saw for themselves how much Sharon was suffering. There were bottles of medication out and everything, and in the end the twins insisted they help her with the drinks. Sharon wanted to argue, but really she was feeling weak. In the end she had to be the one seated as the twins got the tea ready.

Sharon watched them, a smile playing across her face. She loved the twins; they reminded her of when her own daughters had been kids. Amber was practically Alison, and Mikaela was so much like Rachel it was scary, but the pair of them had inherited many traits from their mother and maternal aunt.

As their grandmother, Sharon could tell when her granddaughters were acting like their mother or their aunt, and Sharon was curious about traits that were inherited from their father, Sean. Over the years Sharon had noticed little mannerisms, little things, that didn't belong to the family, and she knew they belonged to Sean and their half brother, but the mannerisms were few and far between. The thought of Sean McCartney made Sharon clench her fists angrily, if the jerk hadn't lied to her she would never have made that phone call, told Rachel her life was a waste, that she was ashamed of her. What made it worse was her daughter, her youngest daughter, was pregnant, and if Sharon had known that she would never have phoned. Because of Sean's lie, Sharon had missed out on the first few years of her granddaughter's lives. That was what had made her angrier, and more determined to make sure she didn't repeat her mistakes. She wanted her children and grandchildren to have good memories of her, not bad ones, but she knew her daughters would remember the bad.

The teacup being gently placed in front of her snapped her out of her reverie, but the twins didn't ask about it, knowing how their own minds sometimes wandered around, making them think.

"It might be a bit full," Mikaela warned as she and her twin sat down with their own teas.

Sharon did her best to smile at the twins as she sipped the hot tea. Her mouth was almost scolded by the heat of the tea, but her tongue instantly detected the sugar and milk content she preferred in her drinks. "How's school been, I heard the nasty teacher had tried calling Rachel about your school performance?"

The twins glanced at each other. They weren't surprised that Sharon knew about the teacher since she'd asked their mother to have a look at the workbooks, only one of a few who'd looked, and she'd been disgusted with the way this teacher was picking on her granddaughters. There was little she could do, but there was a lot Rachel could do, and she did.

"He did," Amber replied shortly, "I was being picked on by someone at the school when it got out we were worried about you, but I punched him. Another teacher watched the whole thing and was about to intervene when the arse got there first. He didn't listen to the other teacher, he just used it as an excuse to call mum. She wasn't happy, and she made sure he knew it."

Sharon nodded approvingly. She didn't say anything to the girls about swearing since they were the right age to begin, and besides the situation was justified. "Forget about him," she said after a moment, "but how's it been for you? I hope you haven't been so frightened for me you've let your schoolwork suffer."

Okay, here Sharon knew that may have sounded off but she didn't want her granddaughters focusing so much on her they were willing to exclude everything else.

The twins weren't surprised by their grandmother's statement. They'd heard it a lot for a while, but since the heart attack and Dorothy's death and from what their gran had said to Janet about getting everything ready, that terrified them both, though Amber had tried to see it all from her grandmother's perspective. Dorothy had been a close friend, only to die around the same time Sharon had had that heart attack, and both of those incidents would've had an effect on Sharon.

"We don't want you to - to," Amber bowed her head, she couldn't say it.

But Sharon could. "Die. Amber, I've been a dead woman walking for the last 10 years. The chemo treatments weren't a quick fix, but I'm grateful for them. They've given me time to fix the millions of mistakes I've made over the years, and they've let me know you two and your cousins all this time. But I'm tired, girls. I'm tired of the doctor's appointments, the chemo treatments. I'm just sick of it."

Sometimes the harsh truth was the best medicine, but Sharon knew the twins wouldn't accept it. She knew Amber had tried to see it from her perspective, but Mikaela seemed to want her to live forever.

"For years I've been afraid to go to sleep, I would lie awake at night, worrying if I would still be alive the next morning. When I had my heart attack and Dorothy died, it got worse. I was laid out in a hospital bed for days, and when I left I had to face facts. I realised I wasn't going to be around for ever."

* * *

Rachel was busy making tea as her mind reeled from what she'd just learnt from the twins. No matter how many times she'd heard it already it was still stunning to her to how her mother was so determined to get ready to die, it was like hearing how a city constantly wrecked by earthquakes and storms just went through the same things over and over again.

But the real reason she was reeling was because her daughters had heard it straight from her own mother's mouth. Truthfully, Rachel had wondered during some of the times over the last 10 years whenever she had a moment to put aside her 'party face' and just get back to sorting through her affairs. From time to time she'd stop, then she'd go back to working through everything, making amendments to her will and all that. Sharon wasn't one of those weak willed people who pandered to whomever gave her the most attention, she was willing to divide her money and possessions equally, and though it obviously caused her pain to do it behind her grandchildren's back, she was willing to do it to ensure they had a future.

Sharon was dividing her money between her daughters and their families and a number of charities devoted to researching cancer and leukemia. She didn't want anybody else to suffer the way she and others had for years.

"Mum, you okay? That kettle's boiled."

So it had, and Rachel was cursing herself for letting herself get distracted. When she'd made herself a nice mug of tea, she smiled at her daughter. "Where's Mikaela?"

Amber frowned, wondering once more how her mother was able to tell her and her sister apart from each other when no-one else could. They'd always managed to play pranks on their family, especially Alison and Janet, but their mother was always good at seeing through their lies after playing along with them from time to time when they were younger before dropping her act, and was effortlessly able to scold them.

"She's in our room," Amber replied, "playing on the computer."

Rachel frowned, as a copper she was more than aware of the dangers kids could get into on computers, which was why she monitored the bills and checked the websites her daughters accessed. Some might say she was acting like a member of the gestapo, but she was only interested in her daughter's safety. She was their parent, it was her job.

Amber and Mikaela didn't know that part, and she wasn't going to say anything unless it was vital.

"Okay," Rachel said before they sat down at the table, studying the girl. Amber was showing a lot of Alison's personality as she grew older, but she was as strong as both her aunt and mother. At the moment the girl was fidgeting a bit. "What's wrong Amber? You're fidgeting like your aunt."

Amber sighed. "I'm worried about gran," she admitted quietly. "I don't like her being like this."

"I know how you feel," Rachel replied softly. "But truthfully this has been on the cards for a long time, and your grandmother knew it. Mum's been living with the knowledge she had leukemia for years, and she's managed to prepare her will, get everything sorted out whilst being there for you, Mikaela and Holly for the first time in your lives."

Amber nodded quietly, aware of this already. That didn't mean she had to like it, though. But Rachel wasn't finished. "When Janet told us 'bout her little chat with mum in the supermarket, she said she'd put it off because of Claire, how she had to arrange her own sister's funeral it all added up. I still remember it. I should, me and Alison helped her through most of it, but it was mostly mum who did it. She had to take so many off days 'cause your grandfather was too bone idle and apathetic to realise his wife needed him and his help.

"I remember how stressed mum was, how many times she shouted at my idiot father and retarded brother when the pair of them were waiting for dinner after me, Alison and her returned to the flat after hours of working on Claire's place. I won't go into details 'bout what that dump was like."

Amber gaped. "Seriously?" she said. "They were so lazy they couldn't even make themselves something to eat?"

Rachel nodded in reply. "Yeah, and so when we returned to the flat after cleaning it up, we were exhausted. The last thing we needed was to babysit two idiots."

The teenager shook her head. "Are all guys in our family like that?"

"Your grandfather was, your uncle is," Rachel replied quietly knowing what her daughter was asking, "your half brother and father were smarter, but they were still a bit clueless and stupid."

Amber sneered at the mention of her brother and father, an expression that seemed...wrong on her face, which was weird since Mikaela sneered openly at people or things that she considered stupid, but in this case was understandable because it was about Sean and Hayden which Rachel knew she would do the instant they were mentioned. Neither of the twins were close to their father. It was true that Sean had come to his senses, well that's what he called it, and he'd tried to come back into her life when the twins were much older.

Unfortunately, it hadn't been a good time for the Baileys, but then again any visit would have been considered wrong, it was the time when the twins were reeling from the knowledge their grandmother had leukemia. The last thing they'd wanted or expected was their father and brain dead brother to come round like they'd always lived here and the divorce had never happened. It was so fake it was pathetic. Rachel hadn't kept in contact with any of the McCartneys after the blame game in the divorce, and she hadn't really cared what he'd thought. It had been a surprise for her and her children when Sean had come back.

Amber had been the one to open the door - only for her idiot father to yank her up, shouting in her ear whilst she had been screaming herself out of fear of being kidnapped by someone, before plopping his shellshocked, annoyed, and generally irritated daughter down on unsteady feet. He hadn't even known his daughter's name for crying out loud because it hadn't occurred to him to know them. Unfortunately - or fortunately for the Baileys - he soon picked up on the mood as he swept into the hall where his second twin daughter and stunned ex wife were. Rachel had jumped up the moment she'd heard Sean's voice and Amber's scream, and the bewildered shock on her face had been so thick you'd have needed a blowtorch to melt it off. She'd run out at the sound of the screaming, but she had paused in surprise at the sight of Sean. The moment she'd gotten a good look at him, Amber realised who he was, and she didn't like it one little bit.

It had taken an hour of pleading of trying to get the moron to sit or stand still and quietly for a minute or two to get him to listen and realise his ex wife and daughters really were not in the mood for cheering up, celebrating his overdue return, or his very presence in their breathing space. Sean had spent the hour asking stupid questions; "Why're you so down in the dumps? I'm back," or "how 'bout your mum gets the dinner on, and we can go to the pictures? Why don't you play dolls or get to know your brother?" Those were examples, but you got the gist of how patronised the Bailey women were. Sean's egotism, how he believed he was the centre of the world and the life of everyone made him more unpleasant to the twins.

It was like the moron had deliberately forgotten how he and Rachel were separated, that she had the rights to the twins, 'cause he hadn't kept his wandering eyes and dick to himself. But that wasn't the only reason the Bailey women disliked him, no the twins disdain for the man went far deeper than that. It was because of him and his cowardly lies their grandmother had missed out on their early years, simply because he couldn't admit that he was the one who'd committed adultery.

It took an hour for them to say why they weren't really welcoming despite their best attempts to shut him up and get Hayden to stop creeping them out, (he only noticed that 45 minutes after he'd sauntered into the flat) and it took another half an hour for him to realise that maybe he wasn't welcome at all. Sean, in typical fashion, had instantly started to apologise, backtrack and be more mature, unfortunately for him it was too late. None of the women in the flat were...impressed by his boisterous entrance. They thought he was an idiot to put it bluntly, and it didn't take long for him to get that after he calmed down enough to notice the women in the flat, his ex wife and twin daughters, were trying to tell him he was not welcome.

Then there was Hayden. The twins didn't really like their brother too well, mostly because their mother had done her level best to keep her own view of Hayden as unbiased and impartial as possible, but when they'd met him... Rachel had told the twins shortly after he and Sean had left the flat how his mother had shagged a black guy and Hayden had witnessed it, making Rachel guess that event was why Hayden was so strange.

The twins had been a little creeped out by him too, it was weird their own brother eyeing them with a such a weird expression on his gormless face. It was like they'd been dumped on a desert island with a few misfits from school or college, and they were the only girls present. The problem was they weren't on a desert island, Hayden wasn't the only guy present, and they were certainly weren't the only women in the flat.

Mikaela was no better. She disliked both her father and half brother, gazing at them like they were maggots in the dustbin when it was her turn to put the rubbish out for the men in the morning, and Amber couldn't blame her really. Neither of the McCartney men had done anything to truly make a good impression of themselves.

Amber shook her head to get the discussion back on track. "So, gran wanted to be put off because of Claire?" she asked. Rachel nodded. "God, what was that woman like?" Amber asked the question more to herself than her mother, but Rachel treated it like a question to herself. "Claire was an arrogant, lazy, disgusting bitch. She was so unhygienic the shops had no choice but to ban her from coming in. When mum took me and your Auntie Alison to the house for the first time, the smell in some areas that lingered after mum had aired the place was appalling. She kept dogs in disgusting conditions, their kennels were filthy and their bedding hadn't been changed in years. They also ate scraps whilst she ate a metric ton of food per day."

Rachel felt she was exaggerating a bit there, since no-one living could eat that much food, and even Amber looked dubious such a person could eat that amount of food herself. "Her dogs were so neglected, starved and filthy one of them broke free before Claire died, though there were others. It was so hungry it immediately attacked a girl, who was lucky her father was nearby, and had a chainsaw handy."

Amber shuddered at the image, unknowingly echoing Auntie Janet's reaction, but Rachel kept talking. "Understandably, the parents tried to sue her, but she died. Does it surprise you my mum really didn't want to think about preparing for her own death?"

The thought of death, the very notion of dying was horrifying for the girl since Amber had barely lived her life, and there was so much more she wanted to do with herself.

Amber couldn't speak, so she answered her mother the only way she could. She shook her head.

* * *

The twins were shopping at the supermarket the next day, and Amber had started to wonder if her estranged father and brother had put some kind of curse on her so whenever she thought or someone was stupid to mention them, they'd appear not long later. When Amber had been a kid she'd read Harry Potter like so many other kids, and though some of the stories had frightened her, Amber recalled something from the first two books that helped her compare the present problem she and her sister had a few days after Amber's chat with Rachel.

Argus Filch, the disgusting caretaker of Hogwarts and overall child hater, had a cat. When the flea bitten mog appeared near unsuspecting and misbehaving students, Filch appeared not long afterwards.

It was weird, she thought that, because a day after Rachel had mentioned Sean and Hayden to her in that conversation, the twins met him again, this time at a supermarket. One of the occupational hazards children of police officers was they had to sometimes cope with their parent or parents being late home, and Amber and Mikaela, like Sammy Murray and Elise and Taisie Scott, had quickly grasped this. When they'd been younger, they'd relied on their Auntie Alison or even Gill Murray when she'd retired to look after them, but as the twins grew older they had to rely more on themselves, and it was true they'd learnt how to cook a meal, clean the flat, and a myriad of other chores.

Sometimes, whenever their mother had work to do, the twins would prepare a girls night between themselves. Like all teenagers, they relished parties, but sometimes they preferred their own company. The girls were preparing for a night to themselves when they met Sean and Hayden.

Mikaela was pushing a trolley, in the middle of telling a particularly filthy joke to her twin when they ran into Sean and Hayden. Literally.

"Oh no," Mikaela moaned, not even trying to keep her annoyance hidden. "Not you two again." Amber shook her head, equally annoyed though not as vocal like her sister.

"Hello to you too, Amber," Sean grinned, taking their annoyance in stride, or at the very least he ignored it. It had genuinely not occurred to him the twins would not be happy to see him after that disaster of a visit, he'd thought that given time the girls would be putty in his hands, that his earlier mistake would be forgiven and forgotten. He also made the honest mistake nearly everyone who met the twins made, getting their names wrong.

The twins were only mildly annoyed by that when it happened with other people since they were identical and mistaken identity was inevitable, but in Sean's case they made an exception. With him, they took their annoyance and held onto it. Petty, but that was how they felt about him. Mikaela opened her mouth, prepared to launch the mother of all rants at her father, but Amber, who quickly grasped what her sister was about to do, put a hand on her arm, making the annoyed twin look at her. Amber then tilted her head, beginning their unspoken twinspeak. Mikaela was annoyed at first, then she became more receptive to her twins idea.

Sean didn't notice their unspoken conversation since it was so rapid, and he wouldn't understand it anyway. "So what're you doing?" he asked, then his hand went to the twins trolley without giving them the opportunity to reply, and lifted up one of the ingredients for the twins dinner.

"What'cha doin?" he asked again, putting an American accent into his voice in the belief the twins were simple and found such things cool. He was wrong. Pity they thought it pathetic and ridiculous.

Amber's voice was deliberately slow, like she were speaking to a really stupid child. It was strange; outside her immediate circles of friends and family, Amber was seen as passive and mellow, and she was mild mannered. But that didn't mean she wasn't as stubborn as her mother and sister, and she never hesitated to prove people wrong. "We're getting things for a quiet night, that's why we've got ingredients in our trolley."

"Why are you staring at us?" Mikaela snapped suddenly. For the last couple of minutes Mikaela had been watching Hayden, and once again the thick as shit fool was staring at her and her sister like he hadn't been fed for a fortnight.

Sean looked between both sisters and his son, blinking stupidly. "What?" Both McCartney men asked at the same time, and the twins rolled their eyes, but Amber realised something.

As the more sensitive Bailey twin let her epiphany open in her mind, the more aggressive twin laid it on thick for the two imbeciles. "Why does he stare at us like we're something in a zoo? Are we really that fascinating, and besides its creepy."

"More to the point, why is he still living with you?" Amber finally asked, her epiphany fully realised. She sneered at her brother. "He's old enough to live by himself, to cook and clean up after himself, have a job, so why isn't he?" She lifted a brow in an eerie impression of her mother.

Mikaela smirked maliciously at the men, who shivered despite their best efforts. "He can't live by himself, can he?" she whispered. "But what I don't get is why you're trying to get back with our mum."

Sean chuckled, though the twins could see how frustrated he was getting thanks to his body language. "I just felt your mother could use some company-"

"She's got us," Mikaela interrupted. "That's all we need. No, more like you wanna use her. Not going to happen, not on our watch."

"Family stick together," Amber said, her stinging voice making Sean wince. "You don't factor in the equation."

"Do you really think that?" Sean asked in a hurt voice. "That I didn't want to be with your mum? She kicked me out-"

"After she caught you shagging three girls our age," Mikaela snarled, stunning Hayden and Sean. "Yeah, she told us the story."

A store supervisor interrupted the argument. "Excuse me, is everything okay?" The woman knew there was clearly something not right going on, but she hoped her presence would dissuade a more volatile argument. Fortunately the Bailey twins didn't want to be here speaking to Sean and Hayden, who still hadn't spoken, so Amber answered for the two of them. "Yeah, we're just moving on," she said, and the twins wheeled their trolley past the two idiots, and went on their way.

"Hope we never meet them again," Mikaela said as they headed for the checkout.

"Don't say that," Amber warned, passing her sister some garlic bread and a massive coke bottle. "I've begun thinking he's put a curse on us, so whenever we say or think about him, he's there. Mum mentioned him last night. We were just chatting 'bout gran."

Mikaela bit her lip, torn between curiosity about why her sister was talking about their gran with their mum and wondering if she even wanted to know. Curiosity won out. "What were you talking about?" she asked, putting the ingredients for their dinner's sauce in the carrier bag.

"'Bout why she was preparing to die," Amber said shortly, and if it were anybody else Mikaela would've ignored the tone, and kept on digging and digging until she got the truth out, but it was a testament she didn't do that to her sister. She just nodded somberly and packed the bags. Amber looked around the checkout aisles, and she spotted Sean and Hayden.

"Oh, for crying out loud," she said, drawing her twins' attention, "are those two parasites never going to crawl back into that sewer they live in and leave us alone?"

"I'm starting to see what you mean about a curse," Mikaela shook her head. "Let's ignore them," she said, uncharacteristically, though Amber knew her twin well. She knew when Mikaela wanted to fight, and when she just wanted peace.

Amber nodded in full agreement. After paying for the food the twins walked out of the supermarket, ignoring Hayden and Sean's calls, and offers for a lift.

"Do you think some people paying attention to how those two are calling us, trying to offer to give us a lift in their car, two teenage girls?" Mikaela asked.

Amber glanced at her sister, a smirk on her face. "I wouldn't be surprised if someone called the police," she replied, "said two men were following two teenage girls, vulnerable, innocent," she sneered, "alone."

Mikaela nodded, "Could you imagine what the coppers would do if they found out the girls were the twin daughters of a Detective Inspector, and one of the men was a PC?"

"No, not really, but it might make Uniform worried," Amber said thoughtfully.

The two girls got a bus and went to their flat.

* * *

The door knocked again, and Sharon moved tiredly to answer it. "Alright, alright, shut up," she called, "I'm coming. Who is it, is that you Mikaela? God, you're impatient, like your," she opened the door, a smile ready on her face, "mother." Her voice trailed off, and her smile fell off her face and shattered on the floor.

"Sean? What're you doing here?" she asked, surprised and unhappy to find her ex son in law on her doorstep, and judging from the figure she could see over his shoulder in his car, Hayden wasn't far away. He never was. Like the twins, although she wouldn't know for a short timeframe, Sharon was a little bit worried that Hayden was still living with his father. The guy was old enough to live and look after himself, theoretically, but Sharon knew that despite Sean's boasts about Hayden being like him, Hayden was anything but. There was something off about him.

"Hi, Sharon," Sean grinned as though he had never lied to her, misled her about Rachel, caused her to take his side because she'd been disgusted by infidelity Rachel hadn't even committed, forcing her to lose contact with her daughters and her granddaughters, losing the first years of her granddaughter's lives, and meaning she would have to work hard to make up for it all.

Sharon wasn't prepared to make him forget it, and so when he spoke again she had the perfect excuse. "Can I come in?" he asked.

Sharon blinked in surprise at how thick he was. Surely he hadn't forgotten the bollocking he'd received from her when she'd learnt the truth? "Sean, you're not welcome in my home. I heard about how you burst back into Rachel's life after all that time, just after the twins found out 'bout my leukemia."

"Oh, right sorry, how are you doing?" The sudden look of concern on his face nearly made Sharon sick at how fake it was. "I'm dying, how do you think I am?" she asked sarcastically, irritated by his question since he'd only asked as an afterthought. "I've lost a good friend not so long ago, I don't have much time left on Earth, but I'm okay with that. Thanks for asking 'bout my leukemia, after I mentioned it." Her voice grew more impatient. "Now, what the fuck do you want? You haven't seen me in years, not that I'm complaining since you ruined my tenuous relationship I had with my girls."

"You did that yourself, remember at the reception?" Sean reminded her, proving he had his moments of common sense. Touche.

Sharon looked away for a moment, slightly ashamed by herself and the drunken memory it invoked. "At least I made up for my mistakes, and I didn't wreck a marriage," she replied quietly. "What do you want?"

"I want help."

Sharon couldn't help it, she sighed so loud she almost coughed up blood. "What for?" she asked impatiently, not bothering to hide her impatience from Sean. If he was going to play games with her, god forbid since she wasn't in the mood, then he would realise it to be a mistake of epic proportions.

"I want to get back in Rachel and the twins lives, you can help."

"Sean, three things; a, you shagged girls who were the same age as the twins are now. Do you really think Mikaela or Amber wants you anywhere near them after that? They know what you did, Rachel told them. Use your brain instead of your dick and mouth, for god's sake. B, Rachel tried to ask you if you would be interested in Amber or Mikaela when they were babies. She gave you a chance. You said no. I don't know why, and I don't particularly want to know your reasoning now. C, the twins don't feel comfortable with you, and besides that you were never in with them."

Sean blinked again. "Why not?" he asked. "I'm their father."

Now she had him. "Then where have you been all this time? Sean, I know you've got dozens of kids out there, all of them with mothers who've had to juggle their working lives with raising them alone because you couldn't grow up and keep your eyes to yourself. Rachel's not unique, and she knows that, so do the twins. You've also got a grown up son, who stares at his half twin sisters like they're the greatest things he's seen on a holiday, or in a porn movie. Why does he do that? He did that to me when he first met me, why?

"Hayden makes them uncomfortable, and you didn't make it easier when you burst into their lives after years of steering clear of them and not giving a damn 'bout what was happening with them for years. Rachel told me after I asked if she'd heard from you, if you'd actually heard you were a father again. Worse, you tried to appear larger than life after the girls had found out I had leukemia and I was going to die soon. Hardly a good impression.

"Don't tell me you're their father. Biologically, yeah, you are their father. But you let your wandering eyes and dick decide what role you had in their lives. Non existent," Sharon emphasised. "What changed? Like I said, you've got dozens of kids out there," she gestured at the street, "what makes Rachel so special?"

Sean had to rein in his temper, lashing out wouldn't help him, and the stress could do terrible things for Sharon's tattered health. That wouldn't help him get back in with Rachel. So he decided to be honest. "I've had so many marriages," he confessed quietly, "I'm tired of it, and I've always had a thing for Rachel. I figured I could make it up to her. Why won't she let me back in?"

"What makes you think Rachel wants anything to do with you?" Sharon closed her eyes, fighting to keep herself standing. It was late, she was tired, and she just wanted to drink her tea in bed whilst she watched a bit of telly. "You betrayed Rachel's trust," she said finally. "I don't think there's going to be a second chance between you two, so don't bother. Is that why you've decided to come to me?" Sharon asked suddenly, an inspiration hitting her. "You want me to put in a good word for you. Why would I do that after you lied to me? Because of your lie, Sean, I lost the chance to know my granddaughters when they were kids. I'm not helping you, now go away or I'll contact the police. I'm sure they'd be interested in how one of their own officers is harassing someone."

Sean glared at her and stormed off. Sharon shook her head, reminded of how melodramatic she'd been.

* * *

Just in case their father had indeed cast a curse on them - Rachel had been amused by Amber's theory, though after hearing about the sudden meeting in the supermarket, and because of the weird and sometimes fantastical things she'd seen in her time as a copper, she knew better than to discount curses - the Bailey girls had decided unanimously to not think about Sean, and if they had to discuss him, and here's where Amber's sense of humor and irony shone through, they would refer to him as "You-Know-Who," or "He-Who-Shags-Alot."

Rachel had passed the message onto her friends, just in case any of them planned to speak about him; Janet, Gill and Sharon had laughed their heads off at the names they referred to Sean as, and they agreed with her, especially Sharon.

Rachel had been annoyed by her ex's hopes for reconciliation, it wasn't going to happen, but she had to give the sod a mark out of ten for his effort. The good thing was the Bailey girls, after their agreement to not think or talk about Sean, didn't see the idiot, allowing them to focus on the important things on their lives. Sharon had told them to focus on their school work; she remembered the trouble Alison and Rachel had gotten in when Claire's funeral was being arranged. She didn't want that to happen again with the twins.

Amber and Mikaela had been reluctant at first to concentrate at school like nothing was wrong, but Rachel had told them their grandmother was right. She stressed for herself how hard it had been concentrating on both school and with helping her mother sort through the dump her aunt had lived in with the dogs.

It took a lot of time to convince the twins, their natural stubbornness made it impossible for them to not care about Sharon, but their equally natural intelligence pushed through. By that point they were a little bit behind in their work, and even though all their teachers were openly concerned and sorry for the twins problem, they didn't want it to continue.

Once the twins started to realise their work was suffering, they managed to get themselves back on track. To say Rachel wasn't disappointed by her daughter's lack of attention to their own futures was an understatement; she knew how they felt, she felt the same way and she didn't want her mother to die, but Rachel had grown up with people dying around her. On top of that Rachel had had years to get used to the idea her mother was dying, for Mikaela and Amber it hadn't been a long time, it had hit them pretty hard though deep down both twins had noticed something off about their grandmother.

Rachel and Alison, long since used to the knowledge their mother was dying, kept working as hard as they did. But whenever they had a moment to themselves, both sisters would think about the good times they'd had with Sharon, and the last 10 years had given them both extra good times to balance out the years of Sharon's absence.

In the Murder Squad unit's office, Rachel was busy at her desk, leafing through the crime scene pictures of the latest case to give herself something to do as her mind went down the route it had been taking on and off for the last few months. Despite her best intentions, the weight of what was happening to Sharon was beginning to affect her work ethic, something Rachel really did not need. She shook her head, stood up from the desk and went to the board, looking at the pictures and arrows on it to see a pattern, a potential lead, but nothing jumped out at her. Fuck. She didn't need this right now, she wanted to at least do something concrete and decisive now while she still could, or else it would all happen tomorrow.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck, and double fuck.

Unfortunately for Rachel, her lack of attention was noticed by the last person she wanted.

"Can I have a word?" Rachel almost jumped out of her skin when she found Andy standing right next to her. She quickly pulled herself together. "Of course," she said, and followed Roper to an adjacent office for some privacy. "What's this all about?" she asked as she sat on the desk, her body language making it clear she'd jump off at a moment's notice in case something came up.

Andy came out and said it. "I saw you floundering out there," he said, "it's your mother."

Rachel sighed. She'd been afraid of this, so she'd told her supervisors of what was wrong with Sharon, especially when she'd had that nasty heart attack. Rachel had quickly become a respected officer, her work depended on her on the ball approach to life. If Roper thought he was going to railroad her and use her issue he was in for a nasty surprise.

Andy Roper's presence to the Murder Unit Rachel worked in was a surprise, and not a nice one. She remembered how he had been during their time in Syndicate 9, but Rachel had changed. Her life as a single mother had matured her, made her buckle down, so she wasn't the airhead he thought she was.

"Look, most of the people in the office know my mother is hanging onto life by a thread," she told him quietly, "besides, I sometimes have days where I'm not one hundred percent, but I get through it."

"I think you've misunderstood," Andy replied, rolling his eyes when he saw the confusion in her face, "I'm sorry 'bout your mum."

Rachel was silent, she hadn't expected him to be sympathetic. "Thanks," she replied at last.

* * *

The Baileys had been keeping an eye on Sharon since Amber and Mikaela had dropped by for a visit, and though she insisted she was okay, she wasn't believed. Rachel and the twins were on tenterhooks. Like Sharon they were afraid that if they went to sleep one night they would wake up, and Sharon would be dead.

Amber and Mikaela did their best to move on with their lives, but like their mother, Auntie Alison and their cousin Holly, they were frightened by the idea of Sharon dying. Gill and Janet knew what the girls were going through, and they rose to the occasion to help them magnificently, but there was only so much they could do.

Rachel and Alison were just as worried. Unlike their father, who had died long before Rachel had hooked up with Sean, whose death had passed by with barely a blink, Sharon had done a lot more to get herself forgiven. She had not given up. She had pushed and pushed and pushed, and she had been let back into the fold, bringing the news she was going to die. Rachel and Alison had spent a lot of time, working hard to move past the issues between them. It hadn't been easy, especially for Alison, but for their mother's sake they did their best to work past their problems.

Everyday, and with permission from their mother and the knowledge of their family, Amber and Mikaela went straight from their school to Sharon's home. The old woman was used to her granddaughters coming round, they'd done it for years after all, but it felt so different now. They could see she was dying every day, despite her obvious attempts to hide her weakness.

* * *

One morning, Rachel woke up like she normally did, but as she blinked to get rid of the disorientation she became aware of something wrong in the universe. As she got ready for a day at work, she mused about what it could be. She and Alison had planned to take Sharon out for a day, a great memory for her to take when she finally died.

Still concerned about what could be wrong, Rachel had a brisk walk around the flat. She stopped by the twin's bedroom, and very quietly she poked her head inside. The twins were still asleep, they had another quarter of an hour before their mobile phone alarms woke them up, she could tell by the clock sitting on Mikaela's bedside table.

The twins were sleeping so peacefully Rachel couldn't feel anything unusual coming from either of them so she closed the door and started getting everything ready.

Half an hour later when the twins emerged from the bathroom as she had breakfast ready, Rachel was still distracted. Something was wrong about today, but she couldn't put her finger on the problem since she had no idea what it was. She knew it had nothing to do with her children, and there was nothing wrong with the flat. Hell, she'd even sniffed round for a gas leak, checked the pipes in case of a flood. But nothing was wrong.

"Hi mum," Amber's concerned voice broke through her thoughts.

Rachel glanced between her daughters. "Morning," she said, still distracted.

"Er, mum," Mikaela began slowly, "you okay?"

Rachel sighed, still troubled. "No, I woke up this morning knowing something was wrong, but I don't know what it is. There's nothing wrong with either of you, and there's nothing wrong with the flat."

The twins turned to look at each other then back at Rachel. "Could it be the car?" Mikaela asked.

"Maybe," Rachel muttered thoughtfully, then she remembered the girls hadn't had their breakfasts yet. "Look, get started eating your breakfasts. Don't let it go to waste."

The girls were soon laughing over everything and nothing as Rachel ate her own breakfast, then her mobile went off. She answered it automatically without bothering to check the caller ID on the screen.

"Hi," she said.

"Rach?" Alison. Her voice instantly made Rachel sit up straight like a statue, stiff as a board. "Alison? You okay, what's wrong?" The twins, hearing the rise of their mother's voice, went silent.

There was the sound of sobbing, and the shaky voice that Rachel knew at once.

"Rachel," Alison said, her voice vibrating with emotion, "I'm at mum's. I woke up early, and I knew something was wrong, but nothing was wrong with my family, so I went round to mum's, check she were okay."

"No," Rachel's breath became raspy and labored as she started to guess what had happened. "Mum," she whispered, making the twins stiff, "mum's dead, isn't she? That's what you're trying to tell me, isn't it?"

"Yeah," the whisper quiet word came over the line.

Rachel shakily sat down in her chair, making Mikaela and Amber stand up and go over to her to comfort her. Rachel wrapped her free arm around one of her daughters, she didn't know which one, and the other stood over her from behind with her arms wrapped around her neck gently. She was just about aware of their sobbing.

"Rachel, you still there?"

"Yeah, have you called an ambulance to take her away?" Rachel winced at how her voice sounded, but her question was practically a squeak that sounded like it was a moment away from collapsing into a whimper.

Hearing that her sister was just as heartbroken as she was, Alison replied, "Not yet. I had to tell you first. I'm gonna call them after this call. I felt you had the right to know before I called them."

"Thank you," Rachel replied quietly. After a few more minutes of chit-chat, Rachel and Alison hung up. Rachel dropped her mobile onto the tabletop and just buried her face in her hands, ignoring her daughters for the time being.

"Mum?" Amber whispered, both sisters had listened to the conversation as best they could.

Rachel looked up, her eye makeup starting to run with the silent tears. "I knew something was wrong," her voice was quiet, "I knew there was something wrong, but I thought it was here, at our flat, not at mums."

Mikaela tightened her grip around her mother's neck. "Mum, its not your fault," she tried.

"I know," Rachel said honestly, then she sighed when she realised it was useless to argue with her daughters. They were right. It wasn't her fault, she'd thought the problem was in her flat, she had thought it closer to home. It wasn't her fault. But she still felt guilty.

"What's Alison going to do?" Mikaela asked.

Rachel sighed and rubbed her eyes. "Alison's calling for the ambulance, and we're going to arrange mum's funeral together. She said she's taking a day off work. So am I."

The twin's breaths hitched. It was very unusual for their mother to deliberately not go into work, but in this case she had no choice. Fortunately, the police allowed compassionate leave when something like this happened, and Rachel could take it or decide not to. It wasn't mandatory. They watched as Rachel picked up her mobile to call the office. The DSI in charge of her unit, already aware of Sharon's leukemia, was sympathetic, genuinely sympathetic. He granted her the right to leave.

Mikaela and Amber wanted, naturally, to stay at home, to be with their mother and aunt. Rachel wouldn't have it at first, but she conceded since the twins would be a great help - she hoped - to Alison and Rachel.

After finishing her call to the school to inform them the twins were not going to be in, Rachel telephoned her friends to let them know about Sharon. Each one were sympathetic, offering to help with the arrangements, and Rachel said that she and Alison should be okay for the time being. Rachel had never organised a funeral before. It wasn't a nice experience. The good thing was both sisters were familiar enough with the terms of Sharon's will to organise it properly.

Sharon hadn't been sure what kind of funeral she'd wanted, but after morbidly checking through her options she'd decided cremation was her best bet. She had toyed with having a burial, but decided against it. Sharon had never liked the thought that after everything she had done, after every sin she'd committed, she did want to rot in a hole in the ground.

True, she had cremated her own sister, but that had been more for expenses purposes and a need to bring Claire down to her lowest point. Her husband, Mike, had been cremated as well, but Sharon wanted to be cremated simply because it felt right to her. She hated the things that went into a burial. She wanted it to be simple, functional but elegant. She didn't want to rot away to nothing, her bones turning to powder. Besides if she were cremated her body would be turned to ash, so what was the point of either one of the methods of disposing of her corpse? In any case Dorothy had asked to be cremated, her reasons were unknown, but Janet suspected Sharon had said something.

Alison and Rachel had an easy time handling this funeral than any of the funerals they'd seen or organised in the past, though it was still very painful. What hurt them the most was their mother had spent a lot of time thinking up the whole thing, and all they had to do was make sure it happened. Alison didn't like the idea of cremation, but it was simpler than just burying her mother in the ground. In the end she'd had little choice in the matter.

* * *

The funeral went well. The service was beautiful, simple and elegant. Just how Sharon had wished it to be. Rachel, the twins, Alison and her family stood with some of Sharon's friends. Many of their mother's friends had been alcoholic loonies, but she had friends that had lasted a long time. Knowing about them was one thing, actually getting in touch and letting them know about Sharon's death was another. Some of them hadn't given a toss since they'd lost touch when Sharon's binges had gotten beyond control and even their tolerance, others were sympathetic but had fallen out with Sharon over the years to care, slotting them in the same category as the first, so they hadn't come. It was genuinely sad.

Learning very quickly to stay on their guard, Alison and Rachel had needed to be very careful about who they phoned. In the end only five of Sharon's most distant friends arrived, and even a few of their own relatives. Rachel was a little bit dismissive of them, then again so was Alison to a limited extent. When Sharon had left the girls and their idiot brother behind with the layabout dad, hardly any of the family had bothered to help them, which made Alison drop out of school. As a result Alison and Rachel, whilst welcoming to the others were more...tolerant of their family than welcoming.

Rachel and Alison had debated having Dom come to the funeral, and whilst they would've been happy for him to share the day with them, they didn't particularly want him around. He was still in prison for murder, and since Janet and Gill were coming they didn't want any reminders for one of Rachel's worst mistakes, but if Alison was honest with herself having Dom at the funeral would be irritating since Tony, her husband, loathed him.

Coming from a family which valued hard work, Tony had grown up believing the philosophy since he knew it worked, and whenever he met Dom he was disgusted by the retards inability to do anything with his life. It was wise to keep him away.

Another thing to worry about was the McCartneys showing up. It was well known Sharon had been friends with them even if she had broken off her friendship with them, and since Sean and Hayden had popped up once or twice neither of the twins really wanted to see them, especially their grandparents. Neither Amber or Mikaela really wanted anything to do with Mr and Mrs McCartney, as kids they hadn't really thought about it until Sharon had appeared. Rachel hadn't had the heart to tell the girls it was the McCartney's who wanted nothing to do with them as kids, but she hadn't had any qualms about telling them when they were older. The twins were not happy, but they hadn't known whether they should've been angry with their mother or their grandparents. After 24 hours of debate, the twins had decided to be angry with Sean's parents.

Rachel had had her reasons, she didn't want her daughters to be hurt over the stupidity of their grandparents and her former inlaws, she didn't want anything to do with Sean, and she didn't want to expose her daughters to him. It helped matters that Sean didn't even bother to visit the Baileys. In the end Alison and Rachel didn't have to worry about Sean turning up at the crematorium, but afterwards when Rachel and the twins returned to the flat after spending the rest of the day at the wake in Alison's home, they received a visitor.

Amber and Mikaela went aimlessly to the living room after changing into their home clothes to watch something, and let their brains dissolve after the day of misery. Rachel was just changing in her room preparing to join both of them in the sitting room, and she'd just left when there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it," she called to the twins, walking to the door.

Rachel regretted answering the door. "What do you want, Sean? I'm really not in the mood. I'm not joking, this is really not a good time."

"I just wanted to see you, I tried earlier but you were out," Sean replied, the stupid grin on his face.

Rachel sighed. She felt her head throbbing already.

"Can I come in?"

"No," Rachel snapped as her patience started wearing thin, "Sean, please, go away. We don't want you here." She tried to close the door, but Sean had planted his foot in the door. Really resisting the urge to simply slam the door shut to break his ankle, Rachel snarled, "What do you want?"

"I want to come in, Rachel," Sean replied, getting angry. She could see the signs. Unfortunately she was getting angry too.

"Tough!"

"I also checked on Sharon, but she wasn't there," Sean went on, but his simple sentence snapped through Rachel's control.

"Yeah, that would probably be because today she was cremated," Rachel snapped at him, "she died, Sean. Thanks for knowing."

The news took the hapless cretin aback. "Sharon's dead? When?"

"She died four days ago," Rachel said softly. "We did consider inviting you, and after all the shit you've pushed us through, we decided not to. Now, please get that foot out of the door before I snap it."

Shaken by the news Sharon was dead and that his ex wife had considered but ultimately decided against inviting him to the funeral, Sean didn't know whether or not he should lose his temper or break down crying. He pulled out his foot shakily, and Rachel felt sorry for him she said, "We didn't do it to hurt you, but seriously we didn't want you around."

"You thought I would do something to you or the twins, on a day like this?" Hurt didn't even begin to describe how Sean felt, that his ex wife and ex sister in law didn't trust him enough to keep his mouth to himself.

Rachel didn't even blink. "Anything is possible," she replied neutrally, "I haven't forgotten how you embarrassed me during our wedding, Sean. Granted, you weren't as bad as mum was," she bowed her head, realising she was spitting on her mothers death, "but you still embarrassed me. And I didn't really want to see you at the funeral.

"You've also ostracised my daughters. Our daughters. Showing up at the flat, meeting them at that supermarket, offering them a lift that made you look and sound like a pervert," Rachel shook her head, "but when it came down to it we didn't want you around. The twins themselves don't want to know you when they learnt their own grandparents didn't want to see them again, not bothering visit yourself didn't help your case. You refused to be here for us, and I had the maturity in this one to think you would at least want to know your own daughters. I offered you that, and you didn't take it. You didn't even if you knew about them. Mum told us 'bout how you were hoping we'd get back together. I can tell you now that it won't happen."

"Why not?!"

Rachel gritted her teeth and narrowed her eyes as she stood her ground. "Mum also told us 'bout how you wanted her to put a good word in for you, and that she had to remind you of how you broke my trust, and she's right. You did betray my trust. If I took you back then it would give you free reign to look around and shag anything in a skirt. It's not going to happen."

"Rachel, I won't-"

"Shut up and listen! I haven't finished with you," Rachel shouted before lowering her voice. "We both know it will. I've spoken to most of your ex's over the years, Sean. One or two of them may have been weak willed to take you back once, twice, three times, but I am not. I heard the stories. Talia Williams, remember her?"

"You met Talia?" Sean asked blandly, then he shook his head. "Whatever she told you-"

"Oh, you mean the five times she was stupid enough to forgive you, only for you to shag other women before she caught you, and then moved?" Rachel sneered. "Too bad for you she kept in touch with some of your other ex's. She moved away so you'd never find her, harass her, or hurt her again. Do you remember what you said to her, Sean?"

Sean's mouth was open, unattractively reminding her of a fish. He didn't reply. Rachel merely took that as a yes. "You said that she meant more to you than anybody else, and like the stupid girl she was she believed you - until she overheard you saying the same sentence to another girl. Then she left you permanently so you would never see her again."

His emotions churning, Sean just stared back at his ex wife, one of them. "I'm not Talia, Sean," Rachel whispered, "I'm not one of those tarts who think you're romantic when you're anything but. I have got enough on my mind to concentrate on, more important things. You don't factor in the equation. I'm sorry but that's the way it is."

Sean was so shocked when Rachel closed the door he didn't realise until he was walking back to his car that in his hand he was still holding the bouquet of flowers he'd brought to woo Rachel. Disgusted and annoyed, Sean threw the bouquet away.

"What happened dad?" Hayden asked as he got back in the car. Sean didn't reply, he just drove on. If Rachel wanted to be alone, he'd let her.

He'd given her a chance to get back with him, to be a father to her kids, but she'd thrown it back in his face.

* * *

"I just wanted to see how you were doing," Janet said to Amber as she sat near the teenager. Apparently the girl had caught a cold from someone at school, and she had no choice but to spend her time at the flat. Janet wondered how the teenager hadn't managed to pass it on to her mother or her twin, but she wasn't going to say anything. Amber was purposefully keeping her distance, and Janet could see the girl had opened the windows to vent the place.

The hoover and the numerous polishes and cloths showed Janet that Amber had been cleaning the place up. Amber made the tea, turning and placing the tissue to her nose to sneeze once or twice. Janet helped her, though she had to be careful, and as they sat down on the couch, Janet studied the teenager. She looked ill, basically, with a red nose, watery eyes, but Amber was obviously determined to keep busy for the sake of being busy.

Amber sat as far as she could from Janet so she didn't pass the cold on to her. "You mean about my cold, or about gran?"

"Both," Janet admitted, sipping from her mug.

Amber blew out a breath, and she had to put her mug on the table as she snatched her handkerchief up and stifled another bout of sneezing. She wiped her nose extra hard. "It could be better," she gasped, "I've had this cold for 24 hours, yet it feels like I've had it for a week."

"How come Mikaela hasn't caught it?" Janet asked curiously.

Amber smiled. "Mikaela and I have our own friends, and sometimes we go off to spend time with them. We're not always joined at the hip, and one of my friends - Caitlin Banks - was suffering from the cold. Stupid girl. Serves her right - she should've taken a few days off for it to clear up. Mikaela and mum are keeping their distance from me, but I reckon they're gonna start sneezing soon enough."

"Do I need to worry?" Janet asked, pretending to look worried, but in truth she knew Amber wouldn't deliberately sneeze on her. Amber smirked back at her. "No, not really, I've got tissues. Just be careful."

"Thanks for the warning," Janet replied wryly. "So, apart from your cold, how are you coping in general? What've you been doing today?"

"Today, I've had the flat to myself. It's rare I get the flat to myself, but I became bored, and I decided to do a bit of cleaning. Mum and Mikaela have gone to school and work, and hopefully they'll both come down with the cold, especially Mikaela who looked like she wanted to run away and leave me here," Amber looked down at her feet, licking her lips. "I - me, mum and Mikaela - we all knew this would happen one day. That gran would die from her leukemia. But its so hard to focus on that knowledge and make it meet reality. So, that's a poor choice of words."

Janet risked catching the cold as she gently put her hands on Amber's shoulders, making the girl look into her eyes. "No, you've actually explained it in terms I can understand. When me and Ade split up, we'd been having problems for a long time. Taisie and Elise possibly asked themselves why we didn't just divorce and get it over with. Then again, when Gill announced her retirement a year after that mess with Helen Bartlett. I'd always asked myself after it happened what seeing someone die would do to Gill, especially since it was a woman the police had persecuted because of what her parents had done."

Amber nodded. "Auntie Janet, do you also feel the same about Auntie Dorothy?"

Janet's breath hitched a bit. "Definitely," she admitted at last. She wasn't angry with Amber for her question, since the discussion was pointed in that direction. "I always feared for my mum's health. I was scarred I would get home after a long day and find an ambulance on my doorstep after a phone call."

Amber nodded again. "I remember the misery," she said, "there were times we found her looking tired. Even Mikaela learnt the hard way not to push or excite her too much."

Janet smirked as she remembered the stories - mock irritated - from her mother. "But how are you and your mother and sister coping?" she asked.

"For all their strengths, mum and Mikaela can be delicate," Amber smirked as Janet huffed and snorted, a grin lighting up her face. "We've all been hit pretty hard by gran's death, though it really hurts. We know all 'bout her problems with mum and Auntie Alison, but we like remembering the good times. I still dunno how she managed to put a smile on her face whilst hiding her leukemia."

"I know," Janet replied. "Even my mum and Taisie and Elise sometimes commented on it even though they knew about it the whole time."

Amber pursed her lips. She still wasn't happy about the necessity behind the deception, though she did understand it. "We had a visitor that night," she said, deftly changing the subject, figuring they would get back to it soon enough. "Sean," she said when Janet quirked a brow questioningly.

"What did he want?" Janet asked with an instant frown.

Amber sighed. "What do you think? He wanted to get back with mum, but she wouldn't let him. She mentioned one of his ex-wives, about how he'd ostracised me and Mikaela. I just can't get why he won't leave us alone."

Janet sighed. "I've heard about some of his ex-wives too, and I know from hearing those stories that he wanted only two things from them. Sex and a place to live, it sounds cynical but its the best I've got. I sometimes visited him and your mum, and he never made the effort to keep the place tidy. It drove Rachel mad. You mum may have been haphazard at times, but even she valued cleanliness from time to time. She still does."

"From what I know 'bout him, that's not so hard to believe," Amber replied darkly. It stunned Janet a little bit to hear the normally mild and sensitive girl speaking darkly about someone, especially if that someone was her own father. Clearly Amber hated or disliked her father more than she realised, but it wasn't Janet's problem. "And now he's planning to do that again, think mum's just some stupid girl who cries at a romance novel?"

"Only we know Rachel doesn't read romance novels, and she doesn't forgive easily if you cross a certain line with her," Janet said.

Amber nodded, her mother was a kind and generous person like her sister and Janet when you looked past her insane personality, but if you pushed, offended, or angered her the way Sean had then you lost any kind of relationship with her. There was no way of getting it back when you did that. Sometimes one of her friends pissed her off, but generally those were tiny things that made her annoyed for a day or a week. All of those friends would never take her trust and betray it the same way Sean had by shagging those girls.

For Janet it was something that annoyed her relentlessly because Sean must have known what he was risking, he must have known that in the middle of a really difficult case Rachel would not be in the mood for any stupidity. Janet had known for a long time her best friend had clearly been having problems with Sean and Hayden, but she had honestly believed it was early marital blues, that Rachel would sooner or later become used to being Sean's wife. Janet could understand Rachel's anger, she genuinely could. She'd been hurt a lot over the years because of Adrian and his lack of either common sense or intelligence, but even Adrian would never shag three girls old enough to be his children in their bed like Sean had done to Rachel.

Deep down, Janet knew Rachel hadn't loved Sean. She'd only married him because she'd thought she had, he had been her rock during that mess Dom had dropped her in.

The only good thing to come out of all that misery was Amber and Mikaela. Janet had been worried that the girls would be hurt by their mother, that Rachel would resent them for what Sean had done. But Rachel wasn't the type of person to pettily hurt two innocent children, and she hadn't. She'd gotten over Sean by the time the girls had been born.

"Which wife did she talk about?" Janet asked.

"Talia Williams. Apparently she swallowed his lies, let Sean back in and he hurt her again," Amber replied.

Janet nodded, though truthfully she didn't really remember which wife Amber had just described. Many of them were practically identical in Janet's mind that it was impossible to keep track, besides Sean had shagged and married and dumped so many women and kids the stories inevitably became boringly monotonous.

"Amber," she began, remembering something the girl had said earlier, "what did you mean by hopefully Mikaela and Rachel would catch your cold?"

Amber smirked, only it disappeared when she opened her mouth. Janet leaned back away from the couch as the girl sneezed again, once, twice, four times into a fresh tissue.

"Sorry," the girl whispered as she wiped her nose, "but answering your question, I want Mikaela and mum to catch this cold 'cause they need something to take their minds off gran. We're taking it hard, her death, but I want something to distract them. It's been tense recently, and its not just us, but Auntie Ali and her family are the same."

Janet sighed. "I know," she said softly, "I also know you, your sister, your aunt, your cousin and your mother are tough. You just need time."

For the first time Janet was pleased she was dealing with Amber and not Mikaela. At least with Amber you received sensitive and well thought answers. With Mikaela you'd just receive aggro.

"Yeah," Amber nodded, not asking "How long? It's been a month already, and we're treading on eggshells." Instead she said, "I know, but hopefully this cold will give them something else to think about. Sorry if that makes me sound nasty," she added.

Janet chuckled, and she was about to lean forward to hug this girl when she remembered she had a cold. "Amber, you have never been nasty - as far as I know - and I know how you feel. Don't forget, it took a while for me to get over my mum's death. I was amazed she lived as long as she did, and I know she died happy. I'm sure Sharon felt the same way. Yes, she messed up badly once or twice, but she made up for it, and she loved you, your sister, your aunt and cousins and your mother."

Despite her cold, red and runny nose, Amber did her best to smile gratefully at her aunt. Then she sobered up as a thought occurred to her.

"Do you think Sean will come back?" she asked.

Janet shrugged. "I can't answer that question. I'm sorry."

Finis.

 **Please tell me what you think about the story, also drop me a line about a new series based in the same line where Rachel's a DI and a single mother to Amber and Mikaela.**


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